The phrase has become as common as the air we breathe. Whether on the right or left, old or young, everyone talks about “my truth” and “your truth.” The first time I heard the term was when Oprah used it on her show fifteen or twenty years ago. I thought, “Oh dear God, don’t let this catch on.”

It caught on. The octogenarian with whom I occasionally have lunch, many of the people in my church (maybe most of them), my granddaughters, and every pundit on television all talk about “your truth.” I’ve even heard fellow-counselors use the term. “My truth” and “your truth” has entered the American lexicon without so much as a whimper. Well, I’m whimpering.

It all began with the discoveries of Quantum physics and the arrival of postmodernism. Physicists discovered objective truth does not exist. The scientist is always a part of the equation. Subatomic particles do different things depending on whether or not they are being observed. The scientist, with his or her purposes, is always a part of the observation.

I liked the way a friend of mine put it in the 1990s in a book chapter on postmodern apologetics, There Is No Such Thing as Objective Truth, and It’s a Good Thing, Too. I loved the chapter. As long as humans or anything created by humans is involved in the measurement, objective truth is not attainable.

The problem is with dualistic thinking. If the only option is dualistic thinking, then if something is not objectively true, it is not true at all. It’s objective truth or nothing. That is what professors in my conservative seminary taught, the all or nothing plan. Such dualistic thinking is neat and tidy, but it does not square with life as we live it.

Recently the British Prime Minister succumbed to the same mistake so many other conservative politicians have made. He is quoted as saying, “There are males and females and that’s it. It’s common sense.” Except it is not. There are dozens of intersex conditions, and study after study show gender is a spectrum. It is the same as saying, “There’s straight and there’s gay and nothing in between.” You won’t find many takers for that statement. We know a lot about bisexuality and many of the other subtleties of sexual identity.

But back to the notion of truth. Those who depend on dualistic thinking have quite a dilemma. If something is not objectively true, then there is no such thing as truth. That is the narrative that has won the day in America, hence the capitulation to “my truth” and “your truth.”

Just because absolute truth or objective truth is not possible, it does not mean we cannot attain something extremely close to objective truth. My friend’s article suggested we name it, “rigorous intersubjective truth.” In other words, with every tool available, we get as close to objective truth as is humanly possible.

That is the kind of truth we’ve been building civilizations upon for millennia. It is the truth obtainable through the scientific method. It has brought us cures for cancer, trips to the moon, the JWST telescope, cell phones, and the computer you’re probably reading this blogpost on.

The truth is determined to be that which is generally agreed upon through rigorous intersubjective study. Some things require more study than others – say Chaos Theory or the Big Bang. Others are fairly simple, like the fact that the New York Mets were terrible this year. Doesn’t take a lot of intersubjective study to reach that conclusion.

All of this to say that truth is best modified by the word “the” and not the words “your” or “my.” Postmodernism, with its need to deconstruct anything and everything, is obsessed with the slippery nature of truth. After the modern age and its conviction about the immutability of reason, I understand this tendency to ride the pendulum to the other extreme. But just because every culture, ethnicity, and people group has its own perspective that will shade the truth, a perspective that needs to be taken into account, it does not mean there is no such thing as truth.

I believe when most people say “my truth” or “your truth” what they are actually referring to is not truth at all, but their preference. I believe green is the prettiest color. You might believe blue is the prettiest color. We each have a preference and opinion, but it is not the truth. The truth is that green and blue are colors, period.

I’m reading a marvelous new book by Yascha Mounk, The Identity Trap. He speaks eloquently and I believe accurately about the state of communication and truth in these tumultuous times. He believes giving up on the notion of truth will not bring us together. It will only separate us, just as giving up on the notion that there is more that unites us than separates us, will also keep feeding America’s ever-increasing divide.

I believe there is more that unites us than separates us, and I believe that is the truth.