Any More Clarity?

Any More Clarity?

Today I am going to answer a few more of your questions.

Since going public with this news, how have people responded?

I have been overwhelmed by the support I have received. It has been amazing and life sustaining. I am embarrassed to say I did not expect it. It has been a source of great encouragement.

One of the more surprising revelations has been the discovery of how many people saw me as a father figure. I had no idea. This news has taken many of them to a difficult place. Can they trust what they learned from me about being a man? Who am I to them now? These are difficult questions, and I wish I could be of more direct help.

Do you plan to continue working within the Christian church movement?

I have worked with Christian churches my entire life.  It is in my DNA.  However, every church and organization with which I served has chosen to end their work relationship with me.  I am still called to that work, however, so I will find a place in which to do it.  It pains me greatly that it will not be in the movement I love so much.

Some have suggested you are “advocating for something,” or “trying to justify yourself.” Are you, in fact, trying to justify yourself?

I did not see those accusations coming and I have been surprised. All I have wanted to do is explain a very difficult reality. That is what I have always done. I am an explainer, one who takes complicated material and makes it understandable to a broader audience. I have absolutely no expectation I will convince anyone of anything.

People tend to make up their own minds about these types of issues. Most choose to get on the cultural bandwagon that travels through their neck of the woods. If it is supportive of trans people, they are supportive. If it is not, they are not. Life is complicated. We can only personally study so many issues. On some subjects, particularly those we are inclined to see as esoteric, we let someone else decide for us. Do I believe this subject is esoteric?  No.  Do I wish everyone would study it for themselves?  Yes.  But most will not and I understand.

Do you have any more clarity about how you plan to proceed?

Yes, I do have more clarity. I have decided that moving forward authentically means moving forward as Paula. I am integrating Paul into Paula.  I know legions will disagree. I am sorry. As I said before, I do appreciate the advice of people who have not walked a mile in my shoes. But they have not walked a mile in my shoes. If the life I have lived is not enough to convince people this decision is all right, there is nothing I can say or do that will convince them otherwise.

How do you feel about the days ahead?

I pray I can move forward with wisdom and grace, and find the strength to speak the words of Dag Hammarskjold – “For all that has been, thanks. For all that shall be, yes.”

Copyright c 2014 Paula S. Williams. This document is not to be reproduced or conveyed in any media, neither print nor electronic, without express, written permission of the author.


4 thoughts on “Any More Clarity?

  1. Paul, You have certainly been in my prayers since I read the first article. I am like most of us Christian Church preachers, I suspect, in that I have always had a lot of compassion for people dealing with gender identity issues, but constrained by what I see the Bible teaching. I want to thank you for dealing with this in a forum where we can listen, learn, and think about these issues. I have been reading and sharing each post. You have my friendship and respect, no matter where your journey takes you. God bless.


  2. You’ve shown me what strength, dignity, and resiliency really mean. You’ve shown me what a family looks like by the loving way you’ve raised yours. It’s not hard to see that those who matter most love you and Cathy deeply and feel pride in who you are. You are two amazing women who inspire me every day!


  3. I choose not to remain silent, for fear my silence may be mistaken as disapproval or condemnation. So let me lend my two cents worth… God is not dead, nor does he die. He still reigns in our lives today, and for a brief time you lifted our eyes to Him as a man named Paul. I believe it to still be Gods desire that you continue to turn hearts and souls heavenward in what ever capacity God has blessed you with, be it Paula or Paul. God has blessed you!

    There are too many un-churched that have existed outside the “norms” of the approved, and therefore un-church-able, and yet they are still in need of salvation. Maybe its you who will go, the time may be now.

    I wish you continued love, admiration, and prayers for your successful future of leading minds and saving souls for the Kingdom!


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